I feel like I have learnt a lot about parenting the last few years with Josh. There are so many things that you wouldn’t know until you become a parent yourself. The little things you do just to keep them happy and to have a smile on their little face’s.
– Its 3am and they are screaming for you, you run into their bedroom wondering whats wrong and the worst thing has happened… their favourite teddy is 2cm away from them and they just couldn’t possibly reach that little bit further themselves to grab him. Mummy just reaches him so much better.
– ‘Mummy please don’t wash my hair’ getting in the bath with him and letting him chuck countless bottles of water over your head to make them laugh just so you can do the same back to him (thanks Will for the countless baths you have with Josh and get covered in baby shampoo and water!)
-When you sit and smile through the pain of playing the same matching card game for the 100th time that day. Can we play again? Sure we can I would love to match all your paw patrol cards up again Josh.
-You will have countless £70 plus phone bills just to keep them happy when you are out for food. Mummy please can I watch netflix or I will scream the entire food place down and have everyone stare at you while you feel your cheeks burning up. Of course you can build mummy up a lovely phone bill to go with it.
-You will go hungry! You make yourself a sandwich and a hot cup of tea but you have a lovely happy baby fast asleep on your chest who you just can’t disturb. Leaving you with a lovely cold cup of tea and a soggy sandwich, but at least the baby is sleeping right?
-Your car will resemble a car boot sale full of junk. Clothes, shoes, food wrappers. Crushed cheerios in your back car seat. Spilled fruit shoots hidden by countless pictures drawn from nursery. Who needs a clean car anyway?
-You learn to become a ninja. You learn where all the creeks in your child’s floorboards are and exactly how to avoid them while escaping from the tight grasp they have on your hand when they fall asleep. As soon as you get out of their room you smile like a lunatic because you have basically just won the lottery.
-You ‘pop to the toilet’ a lot. Which really means you are sneaking off to the kitchen to chuck a chocolate bar in to your mouth just because you don’t really want to share.
-Every rule you made or thought you would do with your kid’s before they come really does go out the window. I really won’t give this baby a dummy or ever give him his second ice cream of the day no way. Then they just look at you with their cute little face’s and say ‘but mummy please PLEASE’ and you are just a sucker because just look how cute they are. Who cares that they will have the biggest sugar rush and wont go to sleep till 10.30pm you can cope right?
-You become your own professional photographer. I mean your kids are beautiful so who wouldn’t want to see 500 photos of them uploaded a day?
-You become your child’s interpreter. Aww he’s so cute what did he say iggle piggle? No he said he wanted cheerios and rice crispies for breakfast but definitely no milk. Only you will be able to understand them!
-Try leaving the house in five minutes with two kids. Impossible. It really is like you are about to fly on holiday and you’re packing your kids suitcases every single day. I mean what could they possibly need that massive bag full of things for you may think, but trust me they will through the biggest tantrum you have ever seen if they haven’t got their half bitten red crayon that they need.
-Some days you will count down the minutes/seconds till bed time because you just need the peace and quiet. Then as soon as they are asleep you stare at their perfect little faces and miss them all over again.
-You will use bribery on a day to day basis. Josh you look so cute please let mummy take a photo of you.. ‘NO I will not smile’ you know that magazine you wanted? CHEESE.
-Privacy what is that? You can’t even go to the toilet or have a shower by yourself any more. As soon as you shut that bathroom door it will swing straight back open ‘Muuuuum what you doing?’
-The first few weeks after childbirth is definitely the hardest. You will cry about everything and anything like being given flowers and having no vase. You will hate giving your baby away for cuddles because that’s all you want to do is sit and cuddle them to yourself. Watching people feed them/wind them is a massive struggle because they just do it differently to you.
-Watching your first born bond with your second born is the most amazing experience. Watching them turn into an incredible big brother who offers to help (even with the stinky nappy changes) just makes you feel like the luckiest mummy in the whole entire world.
-You will get used to being red faced. While your talking to the post man about how lovely the weather is and all you can hear is ‘Mum wow come and look at the poo I just did it is MASSIVE and it smells SO bad’ Thanks Josh!!!
-It isn’t just the terrible two’s that exists in fact every age your child reaches has something that will push you close to insanity.
-Netflix and chill really does mean just that. Chuck on a paw patrol and breathe…
-You turn in to the hulk. One four year old on one arm, a car seat with baby and baby changer bag in the other who need’s a man?
-You can (and will) survive on little sleep and still function even if it feels impossible.
-Sometimes the ipad becomes your best friend and you will let them sit with it for an hour (or three)
-It really will make you appreciate your parents so much more. You realise what they went through raising you and you understand the struggles they would of faced. Nothing beats seeing your mum/dad holding your newborn baby and seeing the rush of love in their eyes. Completely priceless.
The day they can tell you that they love you, and cuddle you even though you are completely exhausted, and being a parent is by far one of the hardest, challenging and frustrating experience it is the best decision you have ever made. To watch your babies grow up and change in front of your eyes is the best feeling in the world. No matter how much it burns waking up at 5am countless times a week, and being covered head to toe in baby sick being a parent really is priceless.
You know when you give birth and say you would never ever do it again, I bet you will just to feel that surge of complete love you feel as soon as they place your baby in your arms. Best. Feeling. Ever.