Becoming a parent is a scary but amazing thing. I have learnt so much in such a small period of time that I thought I would share with you.
No two kids are the same
Honestly you have a child, you bring them up from a little baby, through to a toddler then a full on child and you think ‘I have this parent malarkey sorted’ Your second child pops out, you feed him with the same bottles, the same milk and bam he hates them. What is this? Why is he not the same as my first? But my first slept through at three months why is my second still waking up? Where is his routine? I have learnt that no two children are the same. Just because your first was sleeping through at three months doesn’t mean your second will miraculously get that memo (I mean I wish he did!) Your first was in a routine at three months? Yeah trust me that doesn’t mean your second will be! I know I will buy all first size clothes because my first was so little for such a long time, my second is bound to be right? Wrong you will be left with millions of teeny tiny clothes with tags on because he is a little chunk!
My mum is amazing
Honestly you take your mum for granted. It’s only when you become a parent your self you realise that your mum would walk to the end of the earth and back just to make you happy. She will sing that song just one more time for you at 4am in the morning to see that smile on your face. She will pull that funny face 50 more times just to stop you from crying, she will swing you in her arms until they feel like they are going to fall off because she loves you so much. Your mum will always be there for you, and will always have your best interest at heart (even if you don’t believe them at the time!)
You can’t do right in some peoples eyes;
You breast feed? You are wrong
You bottle feed? You are wrong
Stay at home mum? Wrong
Gone back to work and left your children? Wrong
Leave your kids over night? Wrong
Won’t let them out of your sight? Wrong
You dress your children in stylish outfits? Wrong. You dress them in character clothes? You guessed it you’re wrong again. You will always be judged no matter what choice you make so just do what you think is right.
They really don’t stay little for long;
Honestly believe someone when they tell you to cherish every moment because in the blink of an eye they go from a teeny tiny baby to a tantrum filled two/three year old! It only feels like yesterday Josh was placed in my arms and I was chucked a bottle with no clue how to look after a baby. Now he is just over four, going to big school and is certainly not teeny tiny any more! Take as many photos as you can, don’t listen to people who tell you that you take too many. Trust me you will forget what they were like when they were little and those photos will bring you such happiness when you look back on them. Cherish every moment they fall asleep on your chest especially as they get older as they don’t happen as often. Tell those stories over and over again because soon enough they will be telling you they don’t need a story any more and you will miss those special times so much! I love looking at the videos of Josh when he was little as you honestly don’t realise how much you forget and they are such special memories to keep hold of.
Your house will never stay clean;
You have just cleaned up, put every single toy away back in its home and you decide to make a cup of tea. Off you pop to the kitchen grab a couple of biscuits and go back in to the room with your freshly made brew and what do you see? Thats right world war three has happened in your living room again. Every single toy your child owns has now been chucked all over the floor because your son wanted to find his superman’s shoe that was at the bottom of the toy box! In a few years time when your house is quiet, spotless and toy free you will honestly miss the chaos of toys everywhere and toddler tantrums it will be too quiet and boring so, even if at the time you want to cry when you see the mess the kids have made just remember how lucky you really are to have them with you. The mess can be cleaned up tomorrow, one day your kids won’t want to play with you so make the most of it.
You need your ‘mum friends’
Without my mum friends I honestly don’t know how I would function. They really are the best a girl could ask for. They understand everything you are going through as they to are going through it with you. When you need to vent or cry about something so pointless they understand. When you need adult conversation you can meet up with them, the kids can play and be happy and you feel normal again, like a person and not just a mum. Kids really do make you the best of friends. There is just something about having friends who are also mums compared to your normal friends. My friends without kids just wouldn’t understand half the things I talk about, how tired I really am feeling or why I can’t just leave the kids whenever I want to go out somewhere. I live a different life to my kid less friends I love catching up with them but I feel really out the loop with normal life when we talk! There really isn’t anything better than being out with our children and watching them have fun, while we all catch up and have a laugh.
I can’t spend money on myself without feeling guilty
Honestly its awful, I need new clothes as I am living in old pregnancy clothes from years ago but can I buy myself any? No. I look at the price tag and think but what could I buy the boys for that? I could happily spend £100 in Zara on clothes for them that they don’t need but a £20 top for myself? Not a chance. I actually did buy myself a few cheap tops the other day and felt guilty about it I mean how bad is that! I went to the shops to christmas shop for everyone and what did I come home with? Piles for Josh and nothing for anybody else! Things that I need I just can’t bring myself to buy, things the kids ‘need’ and i’m using contact less on my card quicker than usain bolt can run 100 metres!
My punishments as a child are now my rewards!
Going on a night out? Seriously yawn. When people ask me to go out I think about all the hours I could spend sleeping instead! Freddie wakes up a lot in the night for a dummy and the broken sleep is a killer so why would I want even less sleep? When you do decide to go out, by the time it takes you to peel your children from your leg to stay with the babysitter, you write a 100 page list on the do’s and don’ts of looking after them and try your hardest to squeeze yourself into the tiny outfits you own from pre pregnancy life (and one that isn’t covered in baby sick – Thanks Freddie!) after 2/3 glasses of wine you’re ready for bed (or the floor) and have the mother of all hangovers which as you should know with children they do not mix well.
You will never go to the toilet by yourself again
You honestly take for granted being able to pee in peace. As soon as you shut the door they are there banging on the door with a packet of crisps you must open straight away. They can’t possibly ask their dad who is sat in front of them no, it is far easier to walk up the stairs and march all the way to the bathroom because mummy does it so much better. You get used to going to the toilet with an audience cheering you on. I mean Josh has even said ‘come on mum you can do it’ eagerly praising me like I praise him! When you do get to pee in peace, embrace it that is a luxury that never happens savour. that. moment.
You will think your child is the best at everything
Oh my gosh look at his smile he should totally be a baby model shouldn’t he? Shall we sign him up to every baby agency he would totally become the next big thing!
Wow did you hear him count all the way to 30? I mean no one else’s child could possibly do that as well as he can, should we enter him to Britain’s got talent?
What do you mean he doesn’t want to be your friend anymore? Does he not know how perfect you are? Shall I ring his mother?
Everything your baby does will amaze you and you will want to share it with the entire world. I mean maybe not everyone will agree with you but that doesn’t matter because they are just jealous, right?
Becoming a mum is the best thing that has ever happened to me, the joy and pride I feel on a daily basis is incredible. They make your heart burst with love and nothing will ever compete against the feelings and journey you will go through. You will also want to bash your head against a numerous amount of walls while crying in to your bottle (or 5) of wine. It honestly is the best and hardest thing in the entire world which nothing could ever prepare you for. From being an expert on smelly nappies to knowing all the words to the latest peppa pig episode, those crazy little people you made change your life for the better, they will send you to the brink on insanity and back to happiest you have ever been in the blink of an eye and you wouldn’t change them for the world.